Our IVF (In-Vitro Fertilization) Journey

I'm sorry I've been out of touch. I know it's been a couple months since I last updated about our struggles with conceiving. I'm here now and going to try to fill you in without missing something, but a lot has happened in our lives.

For starters, Mac and I were told by our RE (Reproductive Endocrinologist) that we could do another IUI cycle and risk having another ectopic pregnancy (your chance doubles when you've had one previously), or we could go forth with IVF. Those three letters send a wave of emotions through my body every time I say them. I spent a lot of time asking why this was happening to us. "I can't believe we have to go through this... we're healthy 35 year olds... what's the problem?" Well I'm done asking because I get no where. The more I ask the more I stay in this place of self pity. After a lot of discussion, we decided that we wanted to do this, but we had to come up with the money. I had half of the cost in a savings account that I received from my accident settlement and the other half we would need to get a loan. Yikes! We already had two car loans, a mortgage and an used up equity line of credit loan... what were we to do? One of the options was to decrease some of the loan amounts, but no dice for the mortgages or the car loans. Mac made a decision and traded in his fully loaded 2006 Dodge Magnum R/T w/a HEMI and custom wheels. That car was his baby, but now he was making a sacrifice so he could try to have a baby of his own. I was in awe of his commitment to see this through to the end.

After we made the decision to go forth with IVF, we talked to our RE and he wanted us to take two months off to make sure the chemo drugs were out of my system. He gave us an option of doing one IVF treatment per cycle or try their Shared Risk Program (SRP). The SRP allows couples who don't have any insurance coverage for IVF to try up to six times for one flat rate. If you don't get a live birth after six tries you get a full refund. We can also cancel at anytime and get a full refund. Once we gave the the okay I had to go in for a few tests and since all came back good our RE went ahead and presented our case to the SRP committee. They approved us for the program and a contract was drawn up. We just got the contract last night and I delivered it this morning with the full payment. We're on our way!!!!!

I will start the medical treatments as soon as my next cycle starts, which should be in the next two weeks. The IVF process takes longer then a normal cycle and an IUI cycle, so we want to get started now. We have to go to a self injections class (two hours long) so Mac can learn how to mix the meds and then inject them into my stomach. He got pretty good at this with the last two IUI cycles, but now the injections have tripled. Then I have to go through a Mock Embryo Transfer. Not looking forward to it. The first IVF process from day one should last approximately 26-30 days.

My protocol looks like this:

Step One - Ovulation Induction

Hormone injections are given to stimulate multiple egg production rather than the single egg normally produced by the body each month. Daily gonadotropin injections are then added to stimulate the development of the eggs (3 to 4 shots a day for 10-14 days). These are usually given subcutaneously (under the skin) and are much less uncomfortable than the previous generations of medication. I will then go to the doctors every few days so they can monitor the progress of ovulation induction with ultrasounds and blood estrogen levels. Once I'm ready to trigger Mac will need to give me an injection in the rear... not looking forward to that at all.

Step Two - Egg Retrieval

An egg retrieval is performed by placing a special needle into the ovarian follicle and removing the fluid that contains the egg. This is a relatively minor procedure and is performed by visualizing the follicles with a vaginal ultrasound probe. A needle is directed alongside the probe, through the vaginal wall, and into the ovary. To avoid any discomfort, strong, short acting intravenous sedation is provided.

Step Three - Fertilization and Embryo Culture

Once the follicular fluid is removed from the follicle, the eggs are identified by the embryologist and placed into an incubator. The eggs are fertilized with sperm later that day by conventional insemination (meaning Mac's swimmers have to do the work).

During conventional insemination approximately 50,000 sperm are placed with each egg in a culture dish and left together overnight to undergo the fertilization process.

The eggs will be checked the following day to document fertilization and again the next day to evaluate for early cell division. They are now called embryos and are placed in a solution called media to promote growth.

On day two or three after fertilization, the embryos will be evaluated for blastocyst culture. If there is a sufficient number of dividing embryos they will be placed in special blastocyst media and grown for two or three additional days.

Step Four - Embryo Transfer

Embryos may be transferred on day 3, 5, or 6 after egg retrieval. Transfers on day 5 or 6 are called Blastocyst Transfers. They are placed through the cervix into the uterine cavity using a small, soft catheter. This procedure usually requires no anesthesia. It is similar to the Mock Embryo Transfer which will be performed prior to the actual IVF cycle. I'm pretty sure that I may have to get the anesthesia.

Step 5 - Testing for Pregnancy

If I'm pregnant, they will follow my progress with blood work and ultrasounds for four weeks before referring me back to my obstetrician for continued care.

So now you have an idea of what we're willing to go through to have a child of our own. It's not for the faint of heart. You have to be mentally, physically and emotionally strong. Don't get me wrong, I have my weak moments, but I also have God walking with me through this journey and he is who gives me strength.

"The LORD is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation. He is my God, and I will praise him, my father's God, and I will exalt him." - Exodus 15-2

Thank you for following along on this incredible roller coaster ride with us. Stay tuned for updates and I will try to do better at updating our blog.

LY!

Baby by Justin Beiber (acoustic cover)

Our TTC Journey - Condensed

I have finally decided to talk about our journey to have a baby. It's a very private and personal journey with a lot of highs and lows. I have found that it helps to talk about it. We have been trying to conveive for 22 months. We thought that we could do it on our own, but after a year of trying, we finally made the dreaded appointment with a Fertility Specialist at Shady Grove Fertility Clinic. We were sent for several tests and both of us were fine (normal). There was no reason for why we haven't been able to conceive, so we fell into that group cateorgized as "Unexplained Infertility".

Definition of unexplained infertility:
Infertility cases in which the standard infertility testing has not found a cause for the failure to conceive. Unexplained infertility is also referred to as idiopathic infertility. Another way to explain it is the "doctors can't figure it out" group.

We were told that we could continue to try on our own, but the chance of us conceiving naturally was only 3%. Very shocking to hear. We were advised that we were good candidates for the IUI w/injections program. IUI stands for Interuterine Insemination. That is where they take a fresh sample from Mac, wash it and weed out any bad swimmers and keep only the good. Then with a long catheter, the specialist will insert the sample directly into my uterus, bypassing the cervix. It sounds complicated but the process is vitually pain free and takes about five minutes. Before the actual procedure, at the start of a new cycle, I will take a few medicines, two of which are injections that Mac will administer in my stomach. We decided that we would give it a try.

The first IUI was in January and failed. The second IUI was put on hold because the injectable medicines had left two very large cysts on my right ovary. We held off an entire cycle (30 days, but felt like 60). We did the third IUI procedure on April 11. On April 26 we found out I was pregnant, but my beta numbers were very low. I had to go back on April 28 for more testing and my betas numbers were still low but rising. Back again on April 30 and the same results. Our doctors said they were cautiously opptimistic but they thought I was either going to miscarry or have a possible ectopic pregnancy. The next week would prove to be a very discouraging week. It was confirmed on May 5 that we were pregnant but that it was ectopic (in my right tube). They administered three shots in my hips that morning. Two were called Methotrexate (a chemotherapy drug that stops the growth of rapidly dividing cells, such as embryonic, fetal, and early placenta cells.) and one called Rhogan. We found out that I was Rh Negative and this shot protects me from making antibodies to Rh-positive blood. After two more days of beta tests my numbers continued to increase. On Mothers Day I was instructed to have an ob ultrasound and a second round of Methotrexate. That was a pretty depressing day. Most women are celebrating being mothers and I was saying goodbye to our baby.

Over the next few days, we mourned but we had also resolved that it just wasn't in Gods plan at this time. We were ready to move on with treatments as soon as the doctor gave us the go ahead. I went back to the doctor that week for another beta test and ultrasound. We got the news we were dreading. My numbers were still increasing and emergency Laproscopic surgery was needed. We were sent to Holy Cross Hospital and in a couple hours I was taken back to the OR. Everything was happening so fast. I was so scared and nervous. I was in good hands according to the fertility specialists and hospital. Within six hours we were on our way home... in a lot of pain both physcially and emotionally. The doctor found the pregnancy in my right tube and it has grown so much that my entire tube had to be removed. They also did a D&C at the same time and found that my uterus was clear and my left tube was clean. That was good news... I think.

For the next few days until present day I have been resting and just taking it easy. I am still in a great deal of pain physically (four holes and two incisions in my stomach), and had an allergic reaction to the Betadine they used. But everyday is getting a little better. I have been doing a lot of personal reflection and taking time to consider our next move, which seems to be IVF (In-Vitro Fertilization). I was told this morning that we would have to wait at least two months before we could try again. It will be a very long two months, if not longer.

Mac and I know that we are very blessed to have been able to get pregnant at all. We are hopeful that the future will bring us a little one... or two. We put all our trust in God. Only he knows what the outcome will be. We are going to take one day at a time. If its in his plans we will praise him... if its not in his plans we will praise him.

Someone sent me this video and it hits so close to home for Mac and I. It sums up what we are feeling and what we have been going through. Turn it up!

http://www.tearsandhope.com/emptyarms_video.html

"One Little Word" Project Day

On Saturday, March 6th, mom and I set out early to spend a few hours crafting a "One Little Word" piece of art. It was being held at a lady's house from church. I was a little skeptical at first because I don't know these women and I don't have an artistic bone in my body. If there isn't dirt, a bat, a ball, a pole, a worm or a hook, I'm pretty much out of my element. I decided as I was getting ready that morning to just let God take over me and guide my hand on the canvas.

We arrived a little late (thanks to me waiting until last minute to get my car inspected), but all the ladies were very welcoming. I had seen all of them before. Turns out they are all members of my mom's womens small group at church. I had that thought running through my head, "Oh great. I can only imagine the stuff they've heard about me. Not good." Our teacher was Diane, who was very excited and so patient with all of us, whom had no clue what we were doing.

As nervous as I was about making a fool out of myself, we were ready to begin. We started off with a blank canvas that we had to paint a background on. Diane asked us our color choices and then we created the background by blending those colors. I was more intrigued by all the different color combination's the other women were choosing. After that we painted the letters of our one word with colors that would really stand out on the canvas. Diane then instructed us to go pick out things to put on our canvas that were in relation to the word that we chose and that were important to us and our walk with God. As I walked around looking for items I was really checking out the other ladies "one little words". They were so into it. They were putting all these trinkets and things on their canvas. Perfectly placed like it was God himself who had put them there. I looked at my not so pretty background and painted letters and thought there was no way that ugly thing would ever be pretty enough to show anyone. But with the help of Diane's adopted daughters I was able to get started and my ugly canvas was starting to look like something. I just didn't know what. I had so much stuff on my canvas I didn't know what to do with all of it. Diane told me it's not about having a lot of stuff, or having them perfectly placed. That's when I started to get it... I'm not perfect either, so stop trying to achieve perfection in everything I do.

My word, and my mom's word was "Trust". This is a very small word, that has big meaning for me because I don't trust a lot people... and was really having a hard time trusting God. Just the past ten months have been very challenging for Mac and I. His mother who is physically disabled and mentally unstable had been living with us for the past seven months. I cannot begin to describe how bad it was. I will just say that when your dog has to be prescribed Prozac for anxiety, it's not good. And no I didn't give it to him, but had contemplated taking it my myself many times. There were many days that I prayed for her to get well enough to go back to her own home and let Mac and I finally enjoy being newlyweds, but it didn't happen, so I lost trust in God. He wasn't answering my prayers. On top of that, and only a select few family members and friends know this, but Mackie and I have been trying to conceive our first child for 18 months now. We have put our faith and I thought our trust in God but it wasn't until I went to Diane's house that I realized that I haven't really been trusting him at all. I said I did, but deep inside I knew I didn't. I couldn't. Pat was still living my house and he hadn't given Mackie and I our hearts desire yet. Why should I trust him?

As I sat there placing the trinkets and gadgets on the canvas I realized that I needed to put my Heavenly Father first and to trust in him 100%. Pat wasn't still living with us because God wanted to irritate me. She was still there because Mac needed time to feel secure with his decision to let her go back home. I wasn't thinking about his feelings. Just my own. And as far as having a baby goes... we're not being punished. Its in God's time, not ours. He knows what is best for us. I have resolved that I do TRUST the LORD and that if it's his will for us to have a baby, then we will. And if we don't, then I TRUST him fully to know that there's purpose behind that. I may not know what that purpose is here on this earth, but I will know what it is when I finally meet him.

We are all blank canvases in the beginning... its the choices we make in this life that fill up our canvas.

Here are a few pictures from that life changing day.








If you are interested in learning more about "One Little Word", please check out Diane's blog. She's amazing and so glad that she is apart of our church family at New Hope!

Congratulations Tim, Heather & Daniel on the Arrival of Riley Faye

Hope you enjoy a few pics and a couple short videos of the new addition to the Stone-Gentry Family.

Christmas Eve Kids Show

Marty and Reese put on a show Christmas Eve. Hope you enjoy watching it as much as we did. TURN IT UP!

Vote for Zelda!!!!

BISSELL is having it's annual MVP (Most Valuable Pet) photo contest and I entered Miss. Zelda. If you have time, please throw a bone her way and submit your vote. The second round of voting starts tomorrow. Click on the following button to cast your vote for our little princess.



If she wins she'll receive a $500 shopping spree, and a $10,000 donation to go to the charity of her choice. If she wins she'll give the money to "A Forever Home". It's a rescue organization based out of Chantilly. If you'd like more information you can go to their website www.aforeverhome.org. If she's allowed to split it she will give half to "American Bulldog Rescue" in Pennsylvania.

Zelda and I thank you in advance.

Brandy's Wedding Business is Taking Off

Since planning my wedding in June 2008, my sister has been working non-stop for other brides. Her work is that good. She has been talked about on various wedding planning website, one being Project Wedding. You can read about her work by clicking on the following badge, and if you know anyone getting married, please pass along Brandy's contact info.

Pumpkin Carving

So last night we had our traditional pumpkin carving with the family at Brandy's. A good friend of mine I'll call "big tickle" sent me this great email with a handful of pumpkins that had been carved with faces of the top ten most popular dogs. I'd like to just say that first on the list was the beautiful and confident American Bulldog. I knew I wanted to try to carve my pumpkin because the one picture looked just like Dexter Zane (my one year old rescued American Bulldog). Enough with the story, here is the original professional picture, along with some pics of my attempt at carving this design, and also many attempts to try to get Dex to pose next to my masterpiece. That didn't work out so well. LOL. Enjoy everyone!

My Beautiful Niece - Reese

Took these at my nephew's football game a few weeks ago. I will post the full game day photos later. I just had to get these up.