Week 7 - IVF Journey... Embies Have Slowed Down

I just got my daily update from my doctor. He said that my embryos are growing slower then what they would like to see at this point, but that Day 4 is almost a nebulous day anyway. They are all at or around the 6-8cell range. He said that tomorrow could be completely different and they could start growing rapidly. We're scheduled for a transfer of two embryos for tomorrow but he believes he is going to push it to Day 6 because of the slow growth. I am sad right now because we've gone through enough. I've heard and read that Day 6 transfers don't have a good success rate. That it's possible, but the numbers aren't in our favor.

Thinking I'm just feeling a little sorry for myself right now so I don't have much to say. :(

Week 7 - IVF Journey... Divide and Conquer

Just hung up with the doctor. Here are our stats for today. Out of the 11 embryos, 2 of them are only at the 3-cell stage. The rest divided into either 5-8 cells. I got a little quiet on the phone. My doctor quickly said, "Oh no Brit, this isn't a bad phone call. It's good news. They are growing the way we want them to."

Swoosh, okay, so we will go on to tomorrow still praying that our embryos will continue to divide and conquer. Tomorrow is Day 4 and we're looking for a higher division of cells and even possibly the 8-cells to have formed into a "morula". Here is a picture of an 8-cell embryo and a morula.

Marty has a football game tonight, so I'm going to watch and enjoy my evening and try not to think of our dividing embryos. LOL.

Stay tuned...

Week 6 - IVF Journey... We Have EMBRYOS!!!!

Just got a call from the doctor. He says were looking good so far. Out of the 11 fertilized eggs we now have 11 embryos. Out of the 11 embryos, 7 embryos have divided into 2 cells and 4 embryos have divided into 4 cells. The doctor said they like to see the embryos dividing into between 2 - 4 cells at this stage, so it looks like we are in good shape. Here are a couple pics of what a 2 cell embryo and 4 cell embryo look like.




He will call again tomorrow, but it looks like we aren't going to do the Day 3 Embryo Transfer, we'll stick it out to the Day 5 Blastocyst Transfer. Tomorrow we are praying for numbers between 6-8 cells. Hopefully all of them divide over the next 24 hours.

This is good news and I'm going to embrace the moment and give thanks to God. The glory goes to him.

Stay tuned...

Week 6 - IVF Journey... The #'s Are In

Its one day after the egg retrieval and I'm laying here with Dex and Zelda watching "Bringing Baby Home". I know I shouldn't be watching these types of shows, but I can't help it. It's kinda like watching "Say Yes to the Dress" and not being engaged. I'm a sucker for happy endings.

I'm not feeling so good. Still in some pain, feeling nauseous and a little out of it. Other then that I'm good. Just got a call from my doctor who gave me some news... drum roll please...

Out of the 15 eggs they retrieved, 14 of them fertilized. Out of the 14, three fertilized abnormally so they couldn't use those, which means that 11 of them fertilized normally. I will find out tomorrow how many out of the 11 made it through today and have divided into embryos. Doc said that this is an excellent start.

I thank God for hearing your prayers. I am feeling optimistic but also know that I will accept whatever God has in store for me (us).

I'm going to take a nap. Stay tuned...

Week 6 - IVF Journey... Egg Retrieval

I don't have a lot of energy to write today but I thought I would give a quick update.

The day started off early for a Sunday since we had to be there at 8am and had only two hours to get Mac's swimmers there. We got up around 6am to get our fresh sample. I walked the dogs and Mac went over to his mom's house to take care of her since he wouldn't be able to go back over there the rest of the day. We left the house at 7am for our trip to Shady Grove in Rockville, MD. We arrived around 7:30am and were taken back right away. After getting an IV and almost gagging to death because Mac was passing gas (and laughing hysterically), they finally took me back around 9:28am. I remember laying on the table, putting my legs in these really cool stirrup type things, listening to the nurse with a dallas cowboys beanie on sing and ........ . I woke up in recovery... in a lot of pain. Stayed there about 40 minutes because I wouldn't wake up fully. Finally it was on home to sleep some more. Mac got me settled and then went to Bob Evan's to get me some french toast. I've been sleeping on and off and trying not to take pain meds, but I broke down because I'm hurting.

The good news... the retrieved 15 eggs!!!! I'm waiting for a call from the nurse to let me know how things are looking. I should know tomorrow how many eggs out of the 15 were fertilized. I should know by Tuesday how many fertilized eggs turned into embryos. I should know by Wednesday how many embryos are dividing to the Blastocyst stage. The transfer of the Blastocysts should be Friday.

I'll try to post as soon as I get an update.

Thank you all for your prayers. They are still needed because IVF is not guaranteed. Once the Blastocyst is transferred it still has to implant itself. So I ask for continued prayers for Gods will to be done.

Stay tuned...

Week 6 - IVF Journey... The Time Has Come!

I received a call from the OR nurse at Shady Grove around 7pm last night. She let me know that I would be triggering at 9:30pm. That meant I only had a couple hours left and my nerves were shot. I have been dreading this day. By the time I knew it I had cleaned most of the house and it was five minutes until the shot. I guess I was trying to keep myself busy. Mac got everything mixed and ready to go. At 9:28pm I lied face down on the bed... freaking out... at 9:30pm I asked Mac to hurry up and he said, "I'm done." Hmm... seriously? Really? I barely felt it. I split the credit and give 3/4 to God and 1/4 to Mac for his good dart skills. Ha.

This morning I got up, took care of the dogs, got my hair done, went shopping for a friends wedding next weekend, then stopped by my sisters house. I had the pleasure of driving my 14 year old nephew to a party. I love when I get to spend time with him. Seems like he's so busy now that he's a Freshman. Who am I getting... he's been the busiest kid I've ever known. I've always had to schedule time with him. I got to see my neice for a few minutes, inbetween her playing dress up with her friend. My sisters house is always chaotic, but I love it and brings to light how much I love my crazy family!

Week 6 - IVF Journey... Even More Tests

I don't have a lot to update. I went in for blood work and an ultrasound yesterday morning. I got freaked out because the two doctors doing the ultrasound found an area outside my uterine cavity. At the time they are probing me they start discussing what it could be and how it looks. I'm like, "Uh, excuse me... I'm down here. Could you let me know what's going on?" The nice young doctor that looks just like the Ken doll said it wasn't bad. That they had seen the same spot on my MET and they weren't that concerned. They were worried it could be a cyst growing, but they said as long as it wasn't in piercing through my uterine cavity that we should be good. "Should?" I don't like that. The young nurse who resembles Tina Fey said that I shouldn't worry myself and that everything else looks good. I had a couple of 19cm, 18cm, 17cm, 16cm, 15cm follicles and to wait for a call from my doctor or nurse that afternoon. I met with another nurse after cleaning myself up and expressed my sincere dissatisfaction of having to take an injection in the hip. I believe I went from negotiating, to asking, to downright begging her to give me a smaller needle. And to my chagrin... I WON!!!! I still have a 22.5" gauge needle that needs to go into my hip, but it's much shorter. I'm fine with that because the entire needle needs to be pushed in. Of course I have to ask my main nurse if it's fine. If she says yes then I won't be as nervous. If she says no, let the tears commence. Yes, I am a big baby and I HATE needles. I have been stuck 32 times in my stomach since 09/11 and eight times in the arm. I think I reserve the right to be a little bit of a baby when it comes to this trigger shot in the hip.

This morning yet again I went in for blood work and an ultrasound. They saw some 22cm, 21cm, 20cm, 19cm, and 18cm. The rest were all under 18cm. As I was getting dressed I peaked at the screen and it said I had six follicles over 18cm. My right ovary has four and my left has two. Funny how my right ovary is more active then my left seeing how I don't have a right fallopian tube anymore. The body is amazing. The doctor didn't mention the spot they found yesterday, so maybe they aren't that concerned.

Again, I have to wait for them to call me this afternoon to let me know what the deal is. I am hoping that we trigger tonight and have the egg retrieval on Sunday. I hate to miss church but I believe we'll have to for this.

Stay tuned.

Week 6 - IVF Journey... More Tests

Quick update... I had more blood drawn and another ultrasound. I have two follicles measuring at 16mm, a bunch measuring at 15mm and some measuring at 13mm. They are very happy with the number of follicles I currently have growing. My endometrium lining thickness looks good too. They want to see it over 8mm and mine is greater than 9mm. They are pleased with how I am responding, even if it's at a slower than normal pace.

I have attached a pic of what I see daily as I walk through the doors of the building that Shady Grove is in. Its a long walk to the elevators. It would be nice to have some artwork to look at, especially on the days where I'm just not feeling so hot.


Waiting on a call from my nurse to see what my E2 levels are today. Yesterday it was at 1967. Rising nicely, but still taking the Cetrotide so I don't ovulate on my own. My body is doing some whacky stuff... I feel like a teenager again. Seriously! I have been breaking out bad, bloated, cranky and emotional. Women... I know you know how I'm feeling. Can I get an Amen?!?

Stay tuned...

Week 6 - IVF Journey

I'm a day early I know, but I had some time and a lot has happened since my last post.

So I'm on CD12 (Cycle Day 12) and feeling like an over-inflated balloon. I have been stuck about 31 times with a needle in the past 11 days. This past Saturday they added a 3rd shot (Cetrotide) to my IVF protocol. I get that injection in the stomach every morning. The other two (Gonal-F & Luveris) are still every evening in my stomach. We've been rotating sides daily... left one day, right the next. My stomach is beginning to resemble a child's art work. I often hear diabetics say they feel like a human pin cushion and well... I can sympathize. Mac was in a hurry yesterday and injected the needle into a blood vessel (not his fault). I have a nice bruise... my first one. I have tons of little tiny hole marks but this was my first official bruise. Of course it had to be the medicine that stings going in, so the pain was intensified. I have started to ice my skin for 3 minutes prior to injections. It helps some, but it's not full proof.

I have been to five doctors appointments in the past eight days. I am now on the daily plan, so I will go every morning for the next week and a half. Every visit I have to get blood drawn and a vaginal ultrasound. When your ovaries are stretched to the limit, a Vag US is not pleasant. Yesterday my E2 (Estrogen) was at 1379. Good, but my ovaries are taking their time. They decreased the amount of medicine, but not the amount of injections. Does that make sense? I'm still being stuck the same amount of times a day, just not with as much medicine. Today my ultrasound showed that the follicles in both ovaries are growing... just slowly. I have a lot of follicles but I have eight that are greater then 10mm in size. They are now at 13.5mm. They would like them at 18mm or greater before we'll move on to the actual Egg Retrieval. I'm waiting on a call back from my nurse to let me know what my E2 is today. My guess is it will be high, but hopefully not too high. They don't want me to ovulate on my own. If my follicles kick it into 5th gear then we could be doing the procedure this week. If they don't, then it looks like we'll be triggering (a shot into my hip that will send my body into ovulation within 36 hours) on Friday or Saturday night. That means the actual procedure will be on Sunday or Monday morning. If it's on Monday then I only have to work two days next week. LOL... is it bad that I just put that into the equation?

So here we are. Just waiting. In the meantime, I want to repost a message from a fellow blogger who is going through this same journey. I can relate so much to what she writes. You never think there's anyone out there that could be so similar... but I think I found my soul's twin.

This is from Mary: Today's topic is infertility pet peeves! Since I've begun this infertility journey, I've been surprised at how insensitive people can be. To be fair, I have not disclosed my situation to most people I know simply because I don't want to be defined by it. (I have told only a handful of people about this blog.) Maybe I don't have a right to expect a lot of sensitivity when I haven't shared what I'm going through, but come on people, put on your thinking caps for just a second: I've been married for 11 years, and I don't have children…perhaps there is a reason. So, here are some humdingers I've heard in recent years.

1. You have some catching up to do. A woman struck up a conversation with me at a party with the all-time favorite question "Do you have children?" When I said no, I got the follow-up question "How long have you been married?" When I said 10 years, she looked dumbfounded. Then she said, "Well, you have some catching up to do." Yep, you're right. Would you like to pay for my next IVF cycle?

2. Others' family planning. I have a friend who told me "I'm going to get pregnant in the next month or two so I can have the baby before our trip to Disney World next year." Oh. How nice you can plan it like that. And, it actually WORKED.

3. Look on the bright side. Don't you just hate people who say this? Not just for infertility, for anything. I know I have a lot to be thankful for, and I am. Instead of being Little Miss Sunshine, why don't you just stick it where the sun don't shine?

4. Everything happens for a reason. Also known as "whatever is meant to be will be." If there is one thing I have learned, it is that most everything does not happen for a reason. I believe that bad stuff happens to good people for no good reason at all. I believe that there is no good reason for our infertility troubles. It is our responsibility to deal with these challenges and we're learning a lot in the process, but I don't believe it is for any particular reason. And I refuse to surrender to "whatever is meant to be" when I can fight as hard as I can to make my dream become my reality.

5. Backhanded compliments. "You're house is so clean! It must be easy since you don't have kids." Or "You're so skinny…but you haven't had kids yet." Thanks ... wait a minute ... are you implying that if I had kids I would be a fat slob?

6. You should adopt. This might seem like the most obvious solution in the world; however, adoption is a very complex, individual decision. Most people don't just wake up and say "Adoption! Why didn't I think of that? Let's go adopt today." I guarantee that every person who has experienced infertility has thought about adoption, but it's not the right answer for everyone. Nor is it easy. I have had several friends who have had wonderful experiences with adoption. I have also had friends who have bonded with a baby when the birth mother changes her mind and takes the baby back. I've had friends spend nearly $100,000 in adoption costs. Trust me, it's complicated. There is no cookie-cutter solution for infertility.

7. Quit your job and you'll get pregnant. Maybe this would work, but I don't have the luxury to find out. I've got to pay for those fertility treatments so I don't really have a choice, do I? And then there's the time someone told me to get pregnant so I could quit my stressful job.

8. I know how you feel. If you are going to say this, you had darn well better know how I feel. When someone truly does, it is incredibly validating and comforting. When someone doesn't, it's just insulting. If you have not been through a gamut of painful medical tests that violate your privacy, or experienced weight gain, hair loss, acne, or mood swings because of fertility drugs, if you have not had to give yourself daily shots in the stomach, if you have not drained your bank account to pay for treatments that don't work, if you have not put your life on hold for years waiting for something to happen, then you cannot possibly know how I feel.

9. God has a plan for you. This statement is back-loaded and complex. I was raised in a very religious home, so it makes me feel disloyal to argue with this. But what about my plans for me? Aren't they important?

10. Just relax, and it will happen. Also known as "be positive!" I cannot express enough loathing for these comments. For the record, we did try this—the whole first year we tried to conceive. At that time, I wasn't worried because I was certain we would get pregnant, and we were three years younger then, so our chances would have been better. However, you can help me feel a little more positive if you come closer so I can kick you in the shins.

Thanks Mary for putting into words what we all feel. As for me, my #1 all time favorite insensitive comment that is not mentioned here is when you are around friends that have kids, who may be acting a little crazy or not to their parents liking, and you get the famous... "Are you sure you want kids???".... Well hmm, let me think about this... you know what, now that I've thought about it, YES!

I am so grateful to have such wonderful people in my life. But I do wish others could understand that choosing to proceed with fertility treatments is a major decision that is physically, mentally, financially and emotionally draining. Thank you to everyone who has been supportive and been kind enough to watch what they say. I love you all.

Stay tuned.

Week 5 - IVF Journey

What another interesting week. Saturday was my 36th birthday and turned out to be a wonderful day. Started off with the pups and I going for a 45 minute walk. Came back home and let Dex and Zelda play with a bunch of toys they haven't seen in a while. Dex was like a kid in a candy store. After an hour of that I put the dogs on a tie out in the front yard while I washed my car. They were so good that I decided to take them for a nice car ride. Both of them love the car. Dex sat tall and proud in the front seat as we rolled down the road. I didn't mention though that this whole time I didn't have Dex's muzzle on. That was amazing. A few hours later Mac and I headed down to Elaine's house for a birthday celebration for Jeff and I. A lot of great friends showed up and we all enjoyed playing corn hole and picking crabs. It was a beautiful day and a wonderful way to spend my birthday. Thank you to everyone who came out.

I started the stimulation drugs on Saturday night. Not fun. I have to take two shots a night. The first is Gonal-F and second is Luveris. I can deal with the Gonal-F, but the Luveris stings bad when it goes in. Thankfully I only have a few more days of this. I went in yesterday for more blood work and another ultrasound. Everything looked good and my levels were where they are suppose to be. They think if I keep continuing down this road, we will probably do the Trigger the night of the 20th, the Egg Retrieval on the 22nd or 23rd, then the Egg Transfer on the 25th or 27th. Doctor wants me to continue the Gonal-F and Luveris for one more day and come back and see him. So that means tomorrow morning I will be back in the office giving more blood and letting them take another peak at my insides. Fun stuff right? I'm getting used to this.

So far this process has been pretty smooth, but I am very stressed about having to take the Lupron Trigger shot. I'm just not a fan of getting shot in the hip. I mean been there, done that. I am having a hard time with that and keep trying to get out of it. So far I'm not having any luck. Mac doesn't seem too nervous about giving it to me, but me... I'm freaking out! And I know it only takes less then a minute, but DANG IT... IT HURTS!!!! They did say I could ice the skin for three minutes before hand, but I some how doubt that is going to lessen the pain.

I will know more tomorrow after I get back from the doctors. I will post the results when I hear.

Week 4 - IVF Journey

For those that follow me on Facebook, you know I've been having a bad three weeks emotionally trying to deal with Dex's behavioral issues. I am so emotionally and mentally drained from thinking about it everyday, so this has not been a good week. My heart is hurting. Sorry if my post today is not very uplifting.

The MET went good. A little uncomfortable, but it wasn't too bad. I have to remember not to hold my breath during these types of procedures. It doesn't help as much as I think it does. Everything looked good. They saw nothing crazy, so we move on to the next step.

We had our injections class right after the MET procedure. We've taken the short class before, but this was a two hour class. There were only two men in the room, and Mac was one of them. He's such a good man. He sat through a slide show that had various pictures of a vagina and how a normal cycle works from the beginning to menstruation. Bless his heart, he is a trooper. Men in general like hands on, so I knew as soon as he saw all the needles in front of us he would perk up. He's pretty good at giving me injections already, but he learned how to give me one in the hip as well. The instructor made him show her and the class how he holds the needle, which she said to hold in as if it were a dart. She gave us a fake butt cheek and that is what he practiced on. When he showed the whole class, everyone's face showed (except the other gentlemen) shear panic. I wanted to fall out. Even the instruction said, "Oh, uh, yeah. A little softer this time. Remember you're not playing darts, just hold it like one." She looked at me as if to say, 'I feel sorry for you.' Haha. I trust him and have faith that he will not hurt me too bad. I mean there's only so much he can do since it's a shot in my hip. That's just bad any way you look at it.

So Tuesday I took my last BC pill. I am SO happy. Those things were horrible. I have gained at least 7lbs in three weeks from being on them. The constant bloating, irritability, nausea, etc was just too much. But I am done with them for now. I had blood work and an ultrasound done yesterday and everything looks good. The doctor said that my ovaries are "quiet", which is what they want. I received my box full of meds yesterday... yay. I start stemming with my first two injections on Saturday. If all goes well the two procedures should be some time the week of September 26.

Week 3 - IVF Journey

Ok, WOW, what a week. For starters, the evening of my last post was a nightmare. My pup got scared and redirected his fear at me and I ended up in the hospital. He left two nice size holes in my arm, close to my elbow. One is healing great and the other was way deep and is taking it's time healing. That depth of that hole was about 3/4 the length of his bottom canine tooth. If you know Dexter... that's a big tooth. Haha. Anyway, other then having to take these nasty antibiotics (making me very sick), and some residual pain in my arm, I'm good. And I am not mad at Dex, and no I'm not putting him down or rehoming him. He is mine, I love him. He just has some behavioral issues that we are going to try to work through. I'm not giving up on him.

I am finally getting use to the BC pills. I have a couple more weeks and I'm done with those. Yay. But then comes the other nasty meds. I got my protocol sheet and it looks like I'm doing the Lupron Trigger Protocol. Here is what it looks like for me:

Medications:

• Birth Control Pills - 21-day pack
• Cetrotide Syringes - Daily injections (in my stomach)
• Gonadotropin FSH (Gonal F) and Luveris - Daily injections (in my stomach)
• Lupron w/1ml luerlock syringe, 22g 1.5" needle - Intramuscular (in my behind)
• Zithromax
• Estrace - Daily after egg retrieval
• Endometrin - Daily after egg retrieval
• Children's Aspirin - Daily
• Prenatal Vitamin - Daily
• HCG - Intramuscular (in my behind again)

So there you go. Looks like fun huh?

I go tomorrow morning for the MET and injections class. Wish me luck!!!!